Five Things My Best Friend Taught Me About Marriage

For those of you who don’t know, I have been blessed to call Ashley my best friend for over 12 years. In fact, up until I got married last summer, we also called ourselves roommates; setting records at 11 years of living together. Yes, you read that correctly. I lived with the same girl, and a few other combinations of friends, for over a decade and we lived to tell about it. And we still like each other!

thailand

Riding elephants in Thailand

I’m fairly certain that at various moments throughout the years, those closest to us questioned if we were MORE than just a couple of best friends who liked living together. Maybe it was the 10-year anniversary trip we took to Thailand that raised eyebrows?! And I’m pretty sure that if it hadn’t been for the boyfriends that popped in and out over the years, there would have been a coming-out intervention by one of our families that would have ended in complete and utter awkwardness.

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Honest Friendship

One of the most unexpected results of our miscarriage story has been learning of the other stories of loss that have been carried silently by many of the women (and men) around me. I had no idea what those around me were going through!

You see, one of the first decisions I made after the fog had lifted was was to choose for this story to be a glory story. As much as I wanted to ignore my sad feelings and pretend that life was totally and completely fine, I decided that we could do more than that through our loss. We could use it to bring God glory.

Instead of hiding it in my heart, and covering up my pain, I openly shared our experience over lunch and coffee. When asked by dear friends how my summer was going, I chose to be fully honest, rather than utter the expected pleasantries that we women tend to do when we are hanging out with each other. And in case that wasn’t enough, I decided to blow the lid off this pop stand, and shared it with basically the world and wrote about it on the blog.

And let me tell you, after I stopped freaking out about telling people what was REALLY going on in my life, it was liberating!

But what was even MORE surprising, was how I learned that I was not alone. Continue reading